


The Hot Daga on Opening Night

by Impala_Chick



Category: Buzzfeed: Worth It (Web Series), Watcher Entertainment RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Restaurant, Fluff and Humor, Food Critic, M/M, Shane and Ryan are bad at naming things, Steven is a picky eater
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-30
Updated: 2020-08-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:47:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26185159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Impala_Chick/pseuds/Impala_Chick
Summary: Shane and Ryan finally open the restaurant of their dreams. Food critic Steven Lim is not impressed.
Relationships: Steven Lim/Shane Madej
Comments: 6
Kudos: 18
Collections: Buzzfeed AU August





	The Hot Daga on Opening Night

**Author's Note:**

> Written for AU August over at rarebuzzships! This is definitely crack-y, but I just love AUs with food critic Steven :)

The entire soft opening was a flurry of activity as Shane welcomed guests, ushered them to tables, and worked the phones. Shane was the front of the house guy, because he wasn’t the one who handled the food. That was Ryan’s domain. Ryan mostly stayed in the back to plate everything, and also to have his anxiety-fueled rants in private. 

It was well after 9 p.m. by the time Shane paused and took a good look around. Their restaurant was still buzzing with the energy of the remaining patrons, happily eating and talking. 

Shane looked down at the host book, and realized that they’d filled every single table at least twice over. That had to be a good sign. Their pre-soft opening media blitz really paid off, if he did say so himself. And he _did_ say so, considering that had been his idea.

He walked over to the window and turned the light-up neon sign to “closed.” Ryan wandered to the front of the house soon after, and slapped Shane on the back.

“I think we did it, dude.” He looked absolutely exhausted, with his hair sticking up in every direction and his face just a bit sweaty from working in the kitchen.

“That we did,” Shane said as he gestured over at one of the tables, where a group of five people were happily eating. “Look at all those people! They love the Beer-gara Burger! And the Shaniac Salad! Tonight could not have gone any better.”

\--- 

Okay, maybe the soft opening could have gone better.

The next morning, Shane pulled up the restaurant’s Twitter feed to find that they had a hundred and fifty new followers. New patrons tagged them in some five star reviews on Google, and their page on Yelp already had 4 stars and 37 reviews. 

But all that paled in comparison to the absolutely scathing rant dominating all of their social media feeds. A food critic with a ton of followers must have come in without them noticing. The review he posted had already been shared over 400 times. 

_The whole atmosphere was similar to a Chuck E Cheese in that it seemed like the new owners had no concept of food service. The tables were laid out inefficiently, the food was served on strange plastic plates, and the forks and knives did not match. The menus were printed on half sheets of paper, which made it seem like either they can’t afford menus or they couldn’t decide on the menu until the last minute._

_The menu featured strange items like the “Tasty-gara,” which apparently was supposed to be something like a hot pocket. Or the “Mad-pie” which was some sort of midwest meat pie rip-off. In fact, most of the food items seemed to be name puns based on the two owners’ names, which is either a childish display of immaturity or evidence of extreme narcissism._

_The food itself was passable, as far as American fare goes. There was one dish, just called “toast” that was a flavorful spin on avocado toast. However, I didn’t relish the loud atmosphere or the garish display of bright colors on the walls. It seems like co-owner Ryan Bergara might have lost his touch when it comes to menu choices. I much preferred the food at Buzz Feeds, where Ryan Bergara was sous chef for several years._

_I’d say you’d be better off going through a drive-thru than going to The Hot Daga. You would receive faster service, at least._

Shane groaned after he finished reading. Most of what was written was completely unfair. The menu thing totally had an explanation. They chose simple paper printing to make it easier if they wanted to change things up after the soft opening. The final versions of the menus hadn’t even been printed yet. And maybe service was a little slow because they didn’t expect such an _insane_ amount of people at the soft opening. 

Only a few moments later, the phone rang. Shane winced as he picked it up, because he knew Ryan was not going to be happy.

Without preamble, Ryan cut to the chase. “Did you know we had a food critic come in last night?” 

“How would I have known that? Who does this...” Shane glanced at the guy’s Twitter handle. “Who does Steven Lim think he is?”

Ryan squawked into the phone. “Jesus Christ, Shane. You were the host! And he’s famous! You didn’t even tell me he was in the house.”

Ryan’s voice was more high pitched than normal, and Shane could tell he was stressed, so Shane scrambled to come up with some kind of plan. Maybe they needed to hire a PR professional for this one.

“Okay, maybe we just need-”

Ryan swiftly cut him off. “Let’s start a Twitter feud. Maybe we’ll get more followers out of it. And knock Steven Lim down from his high horse.”

Shane hardly ever got worked up about stupid things like this, but he knew exactly how hard Ryan worked to get their soft opening ready. Ryan deserved credit for all the things that went _right_ that night. 

Ignoring Steven Lim probably wasn’t going to work. But maybe they could take advantage of his huge following somehow. Shane started scrolling through Steven Lim’s Twitter post, doing some serious reconnaissance on his computer while he kept his cell phone tucked against his ear. From his cursory exploration, it seemed that Steven Lim sometimes visited places more than once. 

“Okay, here’s the plan. I butter him up online. I get our menus reprinted on fancier paper and then laminated. I entice him with coupons. He comes back in and BAM, we give him the best experience he’s ever had. He writes a better review, we go on our merry way.”

“That could work.” Ryan exhaled heavily. Shane could picture him pacing his apartment, frantically tugging at his hair. “You’re officially on Steven Lim duty.”

After that, he and Ryan went over their actual grand opening checklist for the third time. 

They’d worked out all the kinks. The grand opening was going to be even better than the soft opening. Which is exactly why Shane felt confident as he slid into Steven Lim’s DMs. Shane could be charming when he wanted to be.

\---

A week later, Shane pulled open the doors of The Hot Daga two minutes before they were set to open.

Steven Lim never responded to Shane’s message, but Shane made sure to study up on him anyway. He was confident that if he showed up for the grand opening, he would recognize him. He’d already picked out the perfect table for him, tucked into the corner that was closest to the kitchen and farthest from the front door. He’d also picked out exactly what food he would be served, to make sure he tried menu items that he hadn’t already written about.

The opening night crowd turned out to be fairly sizable. Shane worked double-time to seat people as quickly as possible, and also helped the bussers clear tables. He stepped in to wait tables too, and he kept a much closer eye on the clock. He felt like the conductor of an orchestra, and the whole place was humming a beautiful tune.

However, his work kept dragging him away from his hosting duties. He happened to be on the other side of the room when Steven Lim walked through the front door.

He looked different from his profile pictures. His hair was blue, for one thing. For another, he had wide-framed glasses on that made him look soft and not at all intimidating. His pictures really didn’t do him justice, but that was neither here nor there. Shane sucked in a breath to focus himself. It was show time.

Shane hurried across the room to intercept Steven before he took a seat on the bench by the front door.

“Hello, sir. Table for one?” Shane asked politely. 

Steven nodded, and then pushed his glasses up his nose. 

“Right this way.” Shane ushered him to the table he’d chosen, and even pulled out his chair for him. 

But doing that immediately made Shane feel weird. The establishment he and Ryan had built wasn’t supposed to be about propriety. Los Angeles already had plenty of fancy eateries - they had set out to be something different. The Hot Daga was supposed to be about good times and good food, but not in a fake corporate way. Shane was proud of their garish colors and weird cartoon food pictures. He was proud of their funny dish names, too. They had personality.

Shane looked at Steven as he carefully took a seat in one of their plastic chairs, and he decided to change course. He wanted to at least be authentic. Consequences be damned.

“Look, I know who you are. And I’ve already picked out what you’re going to eat today. I’d appreciate it if you gave us a fair shake this time around. I’m Shane, by the way.”

Steven blinked up at him with owlish eyes, his lips pursed together in a thin line. He folded his hands in his lap before answering. Shane couldn’t help but stare at his long, delicate fingers.

“Shane Madej? You're one of the co-owners here. Interesting.” Steven tapped his foot on the ground a few times and then gestured towards the kitchen. “Fine. Surprise me.”

Shane was having a hard time reading the guy. His steady and calm demeanor was almost off-putting. But at least everything was out in the open now. It was like a weight had been lifted from Shane’s shoulders. Shane hustled back to the kitchen to put in the order himself. Whatever Steven did after this point was out of Shane’s control. 

When he pushed open the swinging doors that led to the kitchen, he waved hello to the busy kitchen staff and made a beeline for Ryan. He looked extremely busy pulling fries out of the fryer, but Shane figured he would want to know.

“Psst. Steven Lim is here.”

Ryan looked up at Shane and mopped his sweaty brow with a paper towel. “Okay, then why are you in here? Go talk to him.”

“What? You mean like sit with him?”

Ryan squinted at him, clearly conveying how stupid he thought that question was.

“I’m busy, so you are all we’ve got. Charm him. Invite him for dinner again. Take him back to your place. I don’t know, just make him satisfied. Steven Lim duty, remember?” Ryan waved his hands in the hair and turned back to the fryer.

Shane scoffed. “Oh my god, have you no shame?”

Ryan smirked and raised an eyebrow. “I know that look, Shane. You think he’s _interesting_.”

“What look? I have no look!” Shane did a vague hand-wave gesture to dismiss Ryan’s comment and promptly dashed back out of the swinging doors. He could hear Ryan laughing him out of the kitchen.

Shane asked Kelsey to take over hosting duties, and then installed himself awkwardly near the bathrooms to stare at the back of Steven Lim’s head. 

He wasn’t _interested_. It was just that Steven had an air of authority about him, like he knew what he was doing. He also didn’t make many facial expressions which only gave him some serious mysterious man vibes. He hadn’t even smiled yet, and Shane _really_ wanted to get him to smile. Steven’s face had a lovely symmetry to it, which probably meant he had a great smile. 

When the first dish was ready, Shane picked it up to deliver it to Steven himself.

Steven looked up as Shane reached him. “So the owners wait tables here?”

“I just wanted to make sure you got the personal touch.” Shane placed the plate down and wiped his hands on his apron.

“You know, this won’t work if you treat me differently than the other patrons,” Steven said as he picked up his fork.

“Maybe, but I feel like you don’t get our whole vibe. Instead of guessing, you could just ask me.”

That got the tiniest hint of a smile from Steven, and Shane was not disappointed. 

“Generally speaking, I let the food speak for itself,” Steven said matter-of-factly.

Shane pulled out the plastic chair opposite Steven and plopped down. “Fine. I’ll wait.”

Shane crossed his right ankle over his left knee and watched as Steven cut into the Beer-gara burger - cut! With a knife! - and then took a bite. It was a strange sight. 

As Steven chewed, he furrowed his eyebrow and took his time. It was impossible to tell whether he liked it or not, because his face didn’t change.

“Good,” Steven said when he finally put down his fork.

Shane leaned back in his chair, incredulous. “That’s it? Good?”

“Yeah. This might be the best thing on your menu.” Steven tapped the plate with his finger.

Shane uncrossed his arms and cocked his head. “I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic.”

Steven shook his head. “I’m not. Being sarcastic, I mean. However, this doesn’t necessarily make up for the rest of your menu.”

“But what of the ambiance, Steven?” Shane said as he gestured around the dining room, only half-joking. But that prompted a smile from Steven. A big, genuine smile. Shane was absolutely delighted by it.

Shane continued, “I should leave you to it. But I’m telling you, give us a fair shot. There’s a lot you missed the first time around.” 

Then Shane stood up, but he didn’t miss the way Steven dragged his eyes up Shane’s body in a _very_ thorough once-over.

“You want to join me for dinner?” Steven said, his voice casual.

Shane raised an eyebrow, surprised. He went for a joke to distract himself from the way his heart started hammering in his chest. “Will it get us a better review?”

Steven shrugged but there was still a smile on his face. “Depends on how good your company is.”

Shane smirked. That had to count as flirting. “For what it’s worth, I didn’t expect you to be so…” Shane searched for the right word. “Easy to get along with.”

Steven pushed his glasses up on his nose and held up his hand. “Don’t take this the wrong way. I don’t date restaurant owners when I’m reviewing their restaurants.” 

Shane felt like the walls of the room were closing in on him, because it was suddenly very hard to breath. He had been too eager, too stupid, and he’d gone and put his foot in his mouth. He tried to control his facial expression, scrambling for something to say. 

Steven took Shane out of his misery, though.

“But after I finish writing it, I’m fair game at that point.” 

Then Steven smiled an absolutely beautiful smile, and it felt like the sun was coming up.

**Author's Note:**

> Check out the [wonderful moodboard made for this fic](https://rarebuzzships.tumblr.com/post/628170231298277376/he-looked-different-from-his-profile-pictures-his) and consider a reblog :)


End file.
